About Tony

I help people cultivate stronger friendships through my Friendship Lab classes and coaching. I've been studying and teaching about friendship for years. I run workshops at UC Berkeley, teach improv, and perform in shows around the San Francisco Bay Area. I was a C-suite executive and consultant to Fortune 500 firms before discovering my passion for helping people build happier, more friend-filled lives. I received a BA in economics from Stanford and an MBA from UC Berkeley’s Haas School of Business.

How I got Interested in Friendship
I've been thinking about friends and friendship for as long as I can remember. In my 20s and 30s, as many of my friends were pairing off and having kids, I recall feeling hurt that they no longer had as much time to hang out. Friends seemed to be all that mattered in school, but the older we got, the more friendship was devalued. We are expected to throw ourselves into careers, find romantic partners, and raise children. Movies and shows depict meet-cutes and romance, but rarely abiding, deepening friendships. Many assume it's ok to cancel plans with friends if you have work or romantic commitments or secretly just want to stay home on the couch. 

This devaluing of friendship not only made me feel bad, but made society feel bad. Loneliness is at all-time highs across the demographics. Polarization, anger, and feelings of not-belonging became dominant fixtures in our culture. As I read more research on friendship, I became convinced we were losing touch of the thing that ties us to others, allows us live longer and healthier, and fills us with joy --- friends.

Why Friendship is Important
Study after study has found that people with strong social relationships have a 50 percent lower mortality risk than those with weaker ties. Cultivating friendships is just as essential to your health as eating right and exercising. Quality friendships lead to lower rates of anxiety, depression and chronic illness. Friendship makes life easier - e.g. people judge a hill as less steep when they are with a friend. On top of all of this, friends are fun.